2 October 2009

My colleague and friend Chin Aik said we better go and see the fortune cum feng shui Master this evening in Bahau. Fridays has always been a non busy day as I spend most of the time completing administrative tasks such as filing, witing minutes and uploading documents to the elibrary. I left the office at 5pm that day and to meet Chin Aik at his course at Saujana Impian in Kajang and go in one car from there. The drive to Bahau saw me using a new highway LEKAS. The drive was smooth but no sooner, the highway end. I was made to understand that the rest of the highway is still in progress. The drive to Bahau was nostalgic as I used to travel this part when I was attached to MUI Finance in Rembau. Bahau town has certainly changed. We managed to find the Master who sell paus (dumplings) in the day time. After giving the Master my birth date and time, he began some calculations. His prediction was that I could improve by making minor changes to my hall and my bed position in my room. However, he could not "forsee" that my life would be short for when I told him I had tumors he shook his head. Perhaps he is right, wishful thinking on my side.

After consultation on the way back home, I receive a call from my temple friends, Stephanie. She was desperately trying to get to me after having tried so many times earlier. She told me that she knows of a friend that had similar condition as mine several years ago. He had one of his kidney removed but it became apparent the he could not do chemo because his body was severely weakened after the surgery. Then I told her, maybe I can help. I found out about the Gerson therapy when I watch the "Healing Cancer From Inside Out" which I intend to use it on myself. There was a silence when I asked what happened to him. She could not say it and I asked if he had died and she said yes. I told her not to worry as I have passed the self pity stage and I am equally comfortable talking about my own death. This is not the first time I am in a life and death situation. My ex-colleagues in Multi-Purpose Insurance would remember in 5 August 2006, I nearly drowned while playing at the beach. A hugh wave sweep me, Chee Fooi and Kian Beng out to the sea. Luckily Chee Fooi who was about 6ft tall managed to walk back to the beach and got help. By the time they got me out of the sea, I was turning blue, hypothermia. The body functions starts to slow down automatically and only my breathing continued. If I had died on that day, it would have been painless but bloated because I started drinking the sea water. As I was saved in the nick of time, I spend one night at the Kuala Terengganu Hospital accompanied by Beng Chai and was discharged the next day.

The doctors have so far gave me two options; a) chemo and b) experimental drugs. Chemo is out and therefore I have only one option left under conventional treatment. Earlier in the morning, Selayang Hospital has asked me to go over to collect my referral letter to see the Oncologist on 19 October 2009. I met Dr Siti who gave me the referral letter and also a brochure on Sutent, the experimental drug. She asked me to read it and my Oncologist will be discussing it when I next meet them. The brochure only mentioned what Sutent is and also what side effects the patient will have after taking it. There was no mentioned about success rate, how long it had been in use, etc. In short, it's oral chemo.

My brother had wanted to meet me. He told me over the phone that my eldest sister is very worried about me and he needs to meet me to find out my present condition so that he could report to her. I assured by brother that I am fine and not doing anything silly and in fact researching for alternative treatment that I can use. I showed him something on the Gerson therapy and also gave him a copy of the "Healing Cancer From inside Out" DVD.