Thursday, July 21, 2011

Somethings Don't Come Easy

When I first started this blog, I had two target groups of readers in mind. The first group are my friends, ex-colleagues and people I met on my cancer journey who wanted to know my progress and need not to call me every now and then to find out my progress. The second group are new cancer patients and/or caregivers who are embarking on the Gerson Therapy who wants to know what to do, where to buy Gerson supplements, see how another person is doing the therapy and would like an avenue to ask for help. That's all. I am sorry if you find the topics covered too restrictive.

I remember when I first started, I had great difficulty in finding information about the therapy. Blogs that I managed to read tend to be general in nature and was not of much help. Along my cancer journey, I met more patients and caregivers that required Gerson therapy support. If you had followed me to some of the meetings, I believe you would also cry. Due to my cancer, I am able to reach these people, give them some comfort, create positive thoughts in their mind and some hope to make their journey easier. I also got feedback that many of them find the book, A Cancer Therapy - Results of 50 Cases difficult to read and understand. I have also received many more emails from anxious caregivers asking me for my assistance on how to begin the Gerson therapy, healing reactions and other technicalities. They still have not overcome the shock and now have to take an alternative therapy after conventional therapy has failed. I am only too familiar with these because I was also in their shoes 22 months ago. Back then I could not get help, hence the setting up of this blog was to fill the gap. Things you would not find in the book, I make it a point to document them up in this blog. I believe this is the true value of this blog. This blog is not about me though I happen to be the author. I have nothing philosophical or spiritual to share. You may not like the style of my writings. Its not about how great or good I am, in fact I have so many weaknesses that I am a fool to blog about and expose myself in the first place.

This blog is technical and contains many of my own experiences and my experiences with some other cancer patients. It is hope that these second group of readers can benefit from my experiences and not do the wrong things that I have done. As a result, you will see a lot of details given. I also know some people could not afford to go to Mexico or Singapore to hire a therapist to supervise their Gerson therapy. While this blog cannot be replacement for professional advice, it can at least provide some guidance to those that needs it. My only consolation is that some of the second group readers commented that this blog gave them some hope.

I also share some of my frustrations, emotions and dark thoughts in the hope that people with cancer would not bury such thoughts and deal with it. Suppressed toxic emotions are one of the key factor that causes cancer. Many chose to ignore it but it does not mean it is not there. It's just denial. This is also to let them know that these experiences are not unique to them and that it is possible to manage them. How they chose to deal with them is entirely up to them.

Along the way, this blog also attracted a third group of general audience, who may find it less relevant to them. This blog is like a healing journal, boring to read. It is my hope that one of the message that I want to give to the general audience is that the cancer journey is a difficult one. As such change your lifestyle while you still can as prevention is better than cure. I really hope no one gets cancer.

Rhus Verniciflua Stokes (aRVS) Update
I am amazed at the promptness of reply of Mr. Lee Sook Yung of Kyung Hee University, Seoul, Korea. He wants me do another CT scan to see my current condition and medical records before he can decide if the treatment is suitable for me. After all the hype and even before I have been accepted, there is one consideration that I have to take into now.

I have asked him for the approximate costs of the treatment and he said it will be between US$3K-US$4K per month. Furthermore, I will have to go to Korea and be admitted to the clinic for treatment. That will add additional living costs as well. I am just considering 1 year treatment, it will probably add up substantially to about US$6K per month. The costs will come down if they allow me to do the therapy at home after an initial stay in Korea. Anyway, it's beyond my reach.

Mohd Shafiq Update
I have just been informed by my friend Yeong that Shafiq has been admitted to hospital on Monday night. One of the arteries on his swollen leg burst and he was crying in pain. The bleeding has been stopped and the doctors do not know what else to do for him. Shafiq has been asking to go home.

During the SS19/1 Residents' Association carnival, a total of about RM1,700 was collected, of which RM985 was from donation and the balance from sale of plants, durians and compost bins. The money has been released to Shafiq's mother. For more information and photographs of the carnival, please visit here.


  1. We fully respect your blog and for what it is. You do not need to get mad over some of the comments. SHow us your forgiving and calm Buddhist side and also incorporate that nto your blog which I am sure is part of who you are. The healing in the past months must surely be due to this calming spiritual side as well.

    Don't keep just the one side and allow your blog followers to not see the entire scope of your journey.

    Doing this, it might even be more calming for you.

    It does not matter what religion you are but surely if you love Buddhism so much, it must be enough to want to make it part of everything you do and want to share it with the world.

    The reason many seem to perceive the blog as technical and you "dull" is because you do not become who you are on the web. You decisively exclude your spiritual side.

    Please be yourself so that we can fully appreciate the entire magnitude of your healing which I am sure include your spirituality.

    We still love you for who you are. The world is chaotic and in need of more love. Religion teaches love.

  2. CT,

    Agree with annonymous, Buddhist wisdom will lead to understanding your journey so as to set yourself free of pain and suffering. This wisdom can guide you through difficult periods of your life. You then become a beacon of light to others and reveal the light of your beliefs.

  3. Having a journal on the web is your way of saying...This is who I am in totality.

    Don't change because of the readers - your readers must want to change because of you!

    Whether to incorporate your spirituality in your sharing, depends on you...its your life...but our short life here on earth is also meant to touch others too.

    Clearly, the world needs more than facts!

    You are gifted in many ways...bring out the source of the beauty. It is to be shared and not kept hidden. Life is too short for that and you know it.

    Hang in there!

  4. Do not be afraid to be who you are. Never be afraid to share your inner spirituality.

    Let the truth also be known. It is all part of the healing process.

  5. Chang,

    We accept you for who you are, spirituality and all - please do not self censor.

    Fear not of what others think of you. You have come this far.

    All comments good and bad is there for a reason. Always reach out with love as what the Enlightened One would do.

    Blogging becomes difficult if you try to project somebody else. Be you, be free, be happy!

  6. Dear CT,i still say as in most of my comments to you, keep doing what you have been doing without letting up,just be yourself and your journey to look for that light at the end of the tunnel and being cured is truly well on the way,you are an inspiration to us,remain calm and keep writing to us as always.You are always in my prayers.Regards fr AL MAL.

  7. It has been very helpful reading your blog. May God continue to heal you!

  8. In a controversy the instant we feel anger we have already ceased striving for the truth, and have begun striving for ourselves.


  9. What is Buddhist teachings? What is Christian teachings? If you look at it closely, don't all religions teach you to let go of the ego?. Without letting go of the big "I", isn't one following the religion called I instead of Buddhism or Christianity? How can any religion fill you when you are so full of yourself?

  10. Treatment should be low risk, high probability and sustainable.

    Herbs like Sabah Snake Grass and etc are inexpensive.

    Do take note that some herbs in high quantity are very toxic and behave like chemo. Many have died from chemo because of high dosage in the hands of the inexperienced.