Thursday, September 15, 2011

Temporary Fix

As a pain killer, the Pregabalin drug wears offs and the pain comes back. I don't think it tackled the root cause of the problem. One of the main reason why I don't take pain killers is that it is very damaging to the kidneys. Yesterday, by lunch time, I was feeling a little painful again. Of course, after taking the drug, I felt better. Anyway, I will monitor the situation and see what the doctors says in three weeks time. Meanwhile, I am continuing my acupuncture treatment.

Last few days, I have been watching a Korean serial Drama (title loosely translated: Love in 90 days). I bought the DVDs sometime back before my cancer days but did not have time to watch until now. The movie revolves around a couple. They met during their undergraduate days, fell in love but unknown to them, they are related as 1st cousins. The boy's father objected to the relationship. The boy was adamant in marrying his sweetheart and decided to elope to USA to get married. On the day of flight, the father had a meeting with his son and pleaded for the final time to his son to end the relationship and marry another girl of his choice (to help his ailing business). When the son did not agree, in a fit of rage, the father threw himself on to a oncoming lorry and was killed in the process. The boy was saddened by the event, broke up with his sweetheart but did not tell her the reasons. Some years later, the boy married the girl of his father's choice and had a daughter while the girl met and married someone else. Many years later, the boy discovered he had cancer and was given 3 months to live. He then decided that for once in his live, he should live as he wanted. He then went to look for his former sweetheart in the hope that he could spent the last of the 90 days with her. Subsequently, he asked for a divorce from his wife, quit his job and move out to stay on his own.  The bulk of the story is about their relationship during this 90 days. The complications were that both of them are married too. It's quite a touching movie. I have not completed watching the movie.

I have always wondered how people would behave when they have cancer. Although I have met many cancer patients, I have no idea how they behave privately. So far, what I saw from movies are that the person will be temperamental and depressed and almost NEVER bothered to look for alternative treatment. They just take whatever treatment the doctor recommends and then wait to die. After all, movies are from novels written by humans authors, who possibly will act that way if he or she has cancer. I find it hard to reconcile with my own behaviour.  I don't behave that way so it seems strange to me if I am normal?


  1. I thought I had cancer because I was told I had a lump. The first thing I did was to think why I had it and eliminated anything that might have caused cancer, in order to slow down the progress of it. And I sat down and thought if I can endure the treatments of chemo and operations etc. I decided against it very quickly. After that I jumped to juicing and Gerson therapy, all in a couple of weeks. By the time I had a scan there was no lump anymore, although I had other reasons to feel awful about. This cancer experience was interesting for me as I saw how I reacted to it and it was very different to what I would expect myself to behave in this situation before I actually went thorough it. I think we are brave to question what we are offered and follow a route that is not the main road. I believe you were lucky that your cancer was at a stage the doctors couldn't "help" you because it forced to look at other options, which are keeping you alive. I hope your struggle eases in near future and you can enjoy your newly found health fully.

    Best wishes,

  2. Thanks for visiting and commenting.

    While my Malaysian doctors said there are limited treatment for me, my oncologist in Singapore did proposed some new therapies that I can do. After reading, I decided against it.

    I would not want to associate with luck that I am still alive today because nothing happens by chance. At the time when I rejected the conventional treatment, I do not know of a single alternative therapy. I did not even know Gerson Therapy existed. Meanwhile, some of my family members have been urging me to at least do the surgery. Do remember my urologist provided treatment to all his other patients. I chose not to take the treatment because I asked the doctor correct questions that helped me decide not to do. This was the difference between me and the other patients.

    Much later, I myself was also thinking of some hybrid approach (convention + alternative therapies) and in fact scheduled to have a surgery to remove my kidney tumor in November 2010. A week before the surgery, I have decided against it and continued with Gerson Therapy for which I have been doing for more than a year then.

    I just like you to know that the decisions that I made was based on information that I gathered and not "luck".