Thursday, May 10, 2012

You Know When It Comes

Yesterday, I wrote about things don't happen in random and when there is a lesson to be learned, the teacher will appear. I had just finished and published the post, just then (Wed, May 9, 2012 at 4:15 PM), I received an email from a reader from Singapore. She wrote:

I have been reading your blog which I came across when looking up for kidney cancer materials as one of my brothers  (a Malaysian) was unfortunately diagnosed with the disease early this year. It was stage 4 and already spread to both lungs and the right 7th rib. He has the diseased kidney removed. His urologist in a Malaysian hospital advised SUTENT treatment. Like you, he was not keen on this because of the possible severe side effects. 

He did not have any treatment for 2 months after the operation and a CT scan showed progression of the disease. I brought him to Singapore to see an Oncologist who administered a combination of interferon, chemo and a hormone drug. After 9 weeks, the CT scan shows that there are areas of dead tumor cells and no further progression. I thought I just share this with you.

There you have it. There is a lesson for me to learn and the teacher showed up, just like that. And look at the timing! This is definitely not a coincidence. I could have written a different subject matter and she could have sent the email at anytime of the day but it just happened just after I finished and updated my post! Whether I learned the lesson or not, that's another story.

I have to thank my cancer. Cancer has taught me so much for the last 32 months than my last 32 years of working life. Cancer is really show stopper, a life changer. For example money, I gave up my 5 figure salary job just like that. It no longer seem important though I still need it to fund my therapy. All these years, I was thinking about building the future. First setting lower goals and then over a period of time, exchanging smaller goals with larger ones. So I was always chasing after goals, never arriving. Buy a car by installments over 5 years and before I could finished paying off fully the car, it's time to change to another car and the process starts again. I was living in the future, always thinking and planning what to do. Even where I want to retire I would buy a property at the place so that I can retire when the time comes. My cancer has made me planless. Life changing habits. Not easy, still work in progress. Humility, coming to terms with my mortality and discovering myself. All my years of training could not prepare me for this landing. Openness, acceptance and total surrender and more receptive to spiritual instructions provides a possibility of healing.


  1. Dear CT,I have said it many times before to you and will say it again,CT you are the teacher,you are an inspiration to many,just keep doing what YOU think is right and never let up,i know its easier said than done,but you can do it,i believe in your strength and your commitment and you give so much to many.Keep writing.You have my prayers for you.Best Regards AL MAL.P/S Again my humble apologies if i said something wrong here,it came from my heart and i mean well.

  2. In a way, our bodies are inherited from our karma (past and present life). There is no way we can avoid suffering brought to us by our own bodies. Recognition of this fact will help us to face and deal with diseases, defects of our bodies, and live with them harmoniously in one way or another. Obviously, Chang, you are doing well in this aspect.

    Somehow, this is quite 'cruel' but we just can't avoid. Accumulation of good deeds is a must to deal with these body sufferings, and miracles / favourable things may occur to us, ultimately.

    Well, this is what I believe.