Saturday, August 11, 2012

The Show Must Go On

I wanted to update two days back  but due to the pain on my abdominal area, I am unable to sit for long. My condition has not improved. Many of your have contacted me and I am sorry to have kept all of you in the dark.

The abdominal abstention is really giving me a lot of problems. Not being able to eat and also pain all over the body and constipation. Last Tuesday, I did a tapping at Hospis Malaysia and the nurse managed to draw out 2.7 liters of water. But by the next day, my abdominal area is about 70% full back. Looks like I may have to do daily tapping and I will be discussing with my doctor about this and select a hospital to implant a tube on my abdominal area.

I have not given up yet. I am just doing what I can and the focus now is to control the stomach abstention. When this is done, the next step is eat, at least have enough body to mount a fight back. Three days back I developed an instant sore throat and now, I even have problems drinking water. I have stopped all medications since June 2012 and now only on Hospis palliative care.


  1. My thoughts are with you. Am very inspired by your tenacity and the will to live. We should all learn from you. God bless.

  2. June last year the doctor diagnosed my husband with stage 4 prostate cancer. He was prescribed with casodex and zoladex.

    We turned to alternative treatments when hospital can't cure him.

    We went thru B17 and soursop leaves protocols and BSMS protocol.

    He believes that the Bicarbonate Soda together with Maple Syrup he took early this year makes 35 - 40% of his cancer dissapeared. I just mixed the BS with maple syrup and room temp. water. Stirred it well and let my husband drank it.

    He stop taking medications from hospital for few months now except for the painkiller and laxative.

    He is 3 months now on Cantron protocol. He will try another protocol soon.

    BTW, my husband is on very strict diet and do deep breathing few times a day. He still goes to work like normal.

    Dear CT Chang, I pray that you will win your battle with cancer!

  3. Hi CT,
    I am touched by your strong fighting spirit.
    Jesus Christ you! Call to God for help. You are a fighter, I truly wish that you will get well and get better real soon.
    God bless you and I will remember you in my prayer...


  4. Chang, I really prayed for you to get less pain. I have contacted some ex-colleagues. we plan to visit you during the Raya break, tentatively on 21/8/2012. Just give me a call if you need any help. KH.

  5. Hi Chang, Teong Soon and I want to visit you during Raya break. Would you please give me your house address? Thanks. Allen Tan

  6. My family and I are praying for you.
    Continue to be strong.


  7. Do not go gentle into that good night

    by Dylan Thomas

    Do not go gentle into that good night,
    Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
    Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

    Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
    Because their words had forked no lightning they
    Do not go gentle into that good night.

    Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
    Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
    Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

    Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
    And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
    Do not go gentle into that good night.

    Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
    Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
    Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

    And you, my father, there on the sad height,
    Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
    Do not go gentle into that good night.
    Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

    CT, keep up the fight. I stared Death in the face 17 years ago and said "No. Not yet. Go away!"

  8. Dear CT,

    I have been praying, and hoping you would be cured.

    I am very worried about you.
    I used to work for hospice. In our training we were instructed: "not to try and save the patient...just keep them out of pain, and as comfortable as possible,"till they passed on." We were too gradually keep increasing the pain medication usually morphine, until it finally stopped the heart, and they would die.
    Hospice is allotted a grant of a set amount of money to spend on each patient...if the patient dies before the set amount is used, they (the ones in top positions,"representatives" working for hospice, usually Dr.and nurses) get to keep and use the money...left over from each patient allotment; "they do not want to go beyond that allotment amount"...because then the treatment and care becomes voluntary;(they have a hard time finding volunteers that will work for nothing) usually the patient is dead long before the grant money runs out.
    The morphine is given in large enough amounts too make the patient INCOHERENT, "the family thinks the patient has taken a turn for the worse," larger amounts are gradually administered until the heart stops, and the patient is dead!
    Hospice was a great idea for those terminally ill; but unfortunately, it like all government programs has become corrupt because of monetary greed, of those in authority.

    I worry; you not writing...perhaps they (Hospice) have already worked their atrocity.

    Sadly...I saw it too many times!

    Praying For You,

  9. Well, as a Buddhist, we know each of us will pass on, if not now, then later, because each of us has a 'body' that carry our past karma.

    Chang, my thought is with you. Sincerely hope you are doing fine.


  10. Chang,

    Praying for you, that you will find healing and strength. May God grant you peace and comfort as you continue your journey. Whether we live or die, we all belong to Him.