Discomforting Times

I am now going through a period of discomfort, something I have not experienced before since the start of my cancer journey. This discomfort stems from the feverish feeling of my body and its inability to sweat to break the feverish feeling. Hence my body feels warm and cold at the same time. With the warmness, I know my body is trying to induce sweat to cool down the body but it can't. As result, I have these sensations of the coolness of the skin and warmness of the body. This state of affair of the body is very uncomfortable for me. In order to mount enough heat to sweat, I would have to drink a hot drink. When the sweat breaks, I feel a sense of relief. This feeling happens throughout the day which makes me uncomfortable and restless. In addition to the above, sometimes I feel cold to the bone on my left and right legs, especially in the nights. A way out is to massage the legs with some warm medicated oil. So I also spend quite sometime every night self massaging me pair of legs in the middle of the night.

My sleeping pattern is still out of sync. I have been sleeping mostly past 3am and then wake up past 10am. During the daytime, I do try and sleep whenever possible. I also feel quite sleepy between the hours of 6pm and 9pm but unfortunately I can't sleep during these hours. If I do, most likely I will not be able to sleep for the rest of the night. Sometimes my sleepless night is caused by the slight pain on my left knee joint. I hope to treat the left knee joint tumor when I take my next treatment which I planned to do in May 2012 when the weather is warmer in Germany. Again, depending on my body condition, I may bring forward the treatment earlier in Bangkok instead. I have been informed that the hospital in Bangkok is not authorised by the Government to offer such treatment.

I think many of you have been thinking that I am doing a lot of self diagnosis and self medication. As you know, I have rejected conventional treatment and adopted the Gerson Therapy (GT). GT has been quite good to me but not good enough. I have seen a number of alternative practitioners and somehow I was not comfortable with what was recommended to me. Under the circumstances, it looks like I have to trust my own judgement to select some other form of treatment to complement GT. Put it this way, it would be good to be supervised by someone because it's very tiring to search and constantly read what remedies are available for myself. But after seeing how some of alternative practitioners treat people that I know, I thought I would have to take a bigger role to heal myself and not just depend on what these people recommend.