Sleeping Blues

I have been able to keep off pain killers for during daytime for almost a week now but somehow when evening approaches, I do feel a little more painful around the back area. As a result, I have been taking Ultracet (which contains 37.5mg of tramadol HCI and 325mg of paracetamol tablets) to manage my pains in the evenings. Of late, I also noticed that I have been having some breathing difficulties in the evening. The breathing slows down as if I just did a short run. Because of this shortness of breath, I also had trouble sleeping. Somehow by about 3am-4am, my breathing would revert back to normal and it's also around this time I managed to fall asleep. I was wondering if this was due to the tumors in my lungs?

I have been reading about my lumbar spine/right leg problem and I think I have sciatica, which refers to pain, weakness, numbness, or tingling in the leg. It is caused by injury to or pressure on the sciatic nerve. Sciatica is a symptom of another medical problem, not a medical condition on its own. Because the healing pain of the HIFU treatment and sciatica are both on the right side, sometimes, I can't tell which of the two problems are giving me more pain or maybe both of them are jointly giving me the pain. Anyway, while I was reading about the drug Ultracet which I am now taking one tablet at night, I found out that one of the side effects is breathing difficulties besides physical/psychological dependence and a severe withdrawal syndrome. I now understand why I am suffering shortness of breath only at night and why my breathing becomes normal back at around 3am. This is because the effects of the drug wears off by that time. So tonight will be the last time I will take Ultracet. To manage the pain, I would probably take paracetamol or some others instead and see if my breathing improves at night.

I have been thinking of getting another opinion on my lumbar spine problem in respect of treatment options. My existing orthopedic surgeon said if physiotherapy does not help, then the only option left is surgery.

Hoping The Best

The last few days, I was having sleeping problems. During the day time, I spent much of my time resting by lying down in the bed and in the process, I dosed off. By the time night comes, I had sufficient sleep during daytime and therefore could not sleep at night. I am now adjusting my routine by trying not to sleep after 3pm. I would still lie down but for shorter period of time like 15 to 30 minutes max. I need to lie down to help my ease the strain on my back after sitting for too long. This morning, I spent my whole morning sleeping to catch up.

At present, there are three problematic areas for me. The first is my L4/L5 lumbar spine problem that has affected my right leg and giving me a lot of pain. The second is the healing pain from the HIFU treatment. This pain is bearable and not as bad when compared to my first problem. The third problem area is my on/off fever feeling. I don't think I will register a fever temperature when I use the thermometer but I do feel feverish/cold at times. I continued to sweat a lot, so much so I have to change a few t-shirts a day. One problem area that I have excluded is my coughing because it is not causing me that much pain anymore.

The last few days, my healing pain has improved. Touch wood! Every time, I reported some improvement, then the next day the problem came back. Anyway,  I hope for the best and also be less dependent on pain killers.

Learning To Cope With Pain

I have been updating my blog a little late these days. This is because during daytime when I am not taking any pain killer, I feel like a zombie, half dead. I am experiencing a different level of pain since I underwent the HIFU treatment. I have not done any surgery, large or small in my life, so I am learning to deal with the healing pain. Most of the nights, I take a pain killer (normally after 10pm) because without the pain, I would sleep much better. It is also during this time, I feel much alive without much pain and also take the opportunity to update my blog.

Sometime back, I have reported about being seized by constant fever. Well, that fever has not left me and still comes back every now and then. Of late though, I have been having better days. Nowdays I feeling discomfort from the constant wind that blows from my home fan against the skin of my pair of hands and legs. Without the fan, it will be too hot and I will be sweating. So I tend to wear long sleeve t-shirts and track bottom during the day. It seems strange how weak I have become of late.

This evening, I attend my first Chinese New Year gathering at my friend's house which is just two blocks away from my house. I thought I would stay longer and chat with some friends that I have not met for a while but I was not feeling very good and was also feeling some pain at my abdominal area. Some of my friends that I have not met for a while commented that I have grown thinner. Anyway, I managed to stay for about a hour before I had to cut short my stay.

Gaining In Strength

As I said earlier, I have been experiencing healing pains. By healing pain, it does not mean I experience pain all the time. The pain comes and goes. Sometimes for hours, I don't feel any pain but at other times, the pain comes for about 10-20 seconds and then goes away only to come back again immediately, a few minutes later or a few hours later. Each time, the pain only last for a few seconds but it can be painful and uncomfortable. My doctors in China has warned me that they can't predict how long the healing pain will be there. They said because of my large kidney tumor, it is expected that recovery will take a longer time. Most of the time, I do not take any pain killers but if the pain comes in regular frequency, I would take a tablet and the pain would go away. So, I am not taking it on need basis, mostly at night so that the pain if it comes, does not disturb my sleep.

This Chinese New Year, I have been inactive, spending most of my time at home resting. This is because I still can't walk that well though the pain on my right leg is improving. I still have not regain the strength of my right leg to drive. I believe the pain is somehow connected to my kidney tumor. Now that my right kidney tumor is mostly gone, I can feel less pain on my right leg.

Since I came back from China, I have embarked on a modified vegetarian diet plus steamed fish to help in my healing and also to gain back some weight. This plan is going on fine as I noticed I have started  to gain back some weight and and my energy levels have improved slightly. I hope to stay on this diet till end of February 2012 after which I will revert back to the Gerson Therapy.

Organic Germanium Supplement
At the recommendation of my nautropathic physician, I have started to take 400mgs of organic Germanium-132 (Ge-132) daily since yesterday.

In its inorganic form, the trace mineral germanium is used in the electronics industry as a semiconductor, and has no nutritional or therapeutic benefits. However, in its organic form, germanium is being hailed as one of the greatest new developments in the nutritional treatment of cancer.

Organic germanium is a biological-response modifier. Biological-response modifiers are substances that can enable the body to change its response to tumors, resulting in therapeutic benefits. Germanium does not directly attack cancer cells. Instead, it seems to stimulate the body's immune system, making it potentially effective in the treatment of cancer as well as other degenerative diseases.

In its organic form, each atom of germanium is bonded to three atoms of oxygen, making it an efficient carrier of oxygen. According to Dr. Stephen A. Levine, organic germanium seems to be able to partially substitute for or supplement oxygenation in living tissues. Thus, Ge-132's ability to improve the efficiency of oxygen utilization at the cellular level could be of significant benefit.

Ge-132 normalizes and enhances many functions of the immune system. Several studies have reported orally administereredid Ge-132's ability to increase NK cell activity. Ge-132's ability to increase the activity of other white blood cells is also well documented.

A study published in the Journal of Interferon Research concluded that "Organic germanium restores the normal function of T-cells, B-lymphocytes, natural killer cell activity, and the numbers of antibody-forming cells.... Organic germanium has unique physiological activities without any significant side effects."

In his book on germanium, Dr. Asai (who succeeded in synthesizing Ge-123 in 1967) reports that his clinic has successfully treated an impressive range of ailments with Ge-132, including some types of depression, arthritis, vision problems, elevated blood pressure, heavy metal poisoning, and cancer.

It's quite difficult to get organic Ge-132 in Malaysia and even if you managed to get it, the price is ridiculously high. For the price of one bottle (60 capsules of 100mg each) in Malaysia, you can but 4 bottles online from USA and still have a couple of bucks to spare even after paying shipping and 5% import tax. My shipment arrived from USA on the 4th day after I ordered.

New Year Blues

I have not been updating my blog for the past few days, just prior to Chinese New Year. Not that I am busy but rather, I was 'stuck' with some healing pains because I did not take any pain killers. I have been feeling the healing pain daily though I tried to ignore the pain as much as I can. I spent most of my time resting, lying down in bed or sitting on the chair. Where possible, I do try and do some walking around the little garden for some light exercises. But for the Chinese New Year, I decided to take the pain killer tablets, two a day, one on the day time and one at night so that I can have a more comfortable New Year.

Today, I woke up feeling not too well. My head was spinning a little bit and this went on for the whole day. Despite taking naps during the day, my condition did not improve. I also noticed that my left leg has been feeling a little bit cold and also sweating at the same time. My right leg was not affected. Rubbing it with some medicated oil helps for a while but soon the condition came back. I got no idea what's going on. What I did was just keep on massaging my left leg as much as I can.

This feeling of feverish in me still lingers on. Sometimes, I feel good and at other times, the feverish feeling would take over. When I feel cold, I would wear more clothing. Then I would sweat. This also made feel uncomfortable.

Happy Chinese New Year!

I would like to wish all my friends, readers and also  people who celebrate the Chinese Lunar New Year, Happy Chinese New Year!

Gong Xi Fa Cai!

Like A Yo-Yo

I have been back from China for two weeks now. Three days after coming back from China, I started to feel feverish and ever since, I have been feeling feverish on some days and then normal for a day before feeling feverish again. I am feeling much better now even though I am still afraid of the cold (from the wind blowing from the home fan) even at 32°C! Without the fan, I will sweat profusely. How ironic? This morning at about 4.30am, it started to rain. Suddenly I felt very cold on both my feet and hands as if cold air are constantly blowing on the skin of my feet and hands. I have been using some hot medicated oil to rub on my feet.

I have also been phasing out pain killers preferring to take a little healing pain from the abdominal area. Since yesterday, I have stopped taking any pain killer tablet, which I normally take one tablet at night so that the pain would not disturb my sleep. It's improving a little by the day and I guess it would take at least two months before I would be able to feel normal like just before the HIFU treatment. The pain on my right leg is also improving slowly but I have not recovered to the level just before I went to China. Tomorrow, I hope to try driving around the neighborhood to gauge if I am able to drive short distances.

Since I went China for the HIFU treatment, I have suspended Gerson Therapy (GT) and when I came back, I still have not resumed GT. In the meantime, I have been on a modified diet of vegetables and taking a little fish. I have lost a lot of weight (60kgs) while in China and now I hope to gain back some weight to about 63kgs. When that happens, I will resume back GT. Meanwhile, I am also adding back a therapy that I suspended for over 1 year ago. I will be resuming homeopathy treatment but under the supervision of a local homeopathy practitioner who also happens to be my friend. Another treatment that I am considering doing will be DCA which I have written before and  you can read it here. I consulted a nautropathic physician and he has suggested the recommended dosage of 8mg per day, taken twice a day, 8 hours apart with Purer tea. I am now timing when to start this therapy but it will depend on the progress of my HIFU treatment recovery. A patient will either respond to DCA or not. It's one of the cheapest cancer therapy. Another supplement that I will taking is Germanium.

Getting Better

Last night, I finally managed to have some sleep. The feverish feeling is still there and I was also sweating profusely. Instead of staying all night to wipe of my sweat which is discomforting, I just slept. I am still afraid of the cold.

Today I did not take any pain medication in anticipation of the test at the clinic. I think I had mistaken that the visit to the clinic was to check on my lumbar spine problem. The clinic was recommended by a friend who said it might helped me. Anyway, it's a naturopathy clinic and since I was there, I thought why not just complete the test. Basically, the test just confirms my present problem and also recommended some alternative treatment options for me. It's not cheap and I am thinking if I should do the treatments.

Without the pain killers, the pain on my abdominal area is a little more painful but still bearable. Because I did not lie down that much today, the pain seems more pronounced. When I came back from the clinic and took a rest by just lying down flat, the pain subsided.

I think I am putting a back a little more weight as I am now eating much more each day when compared to when I was in China. Now, I am feeling a little bit warm, much like in the beginning when I started Gerson Therapy. This warmness is fine with me although it will mean I will be a little afraid of cold water. I think this is a good development.

Recovering Slowly

I have been having low fever for about 5 days in a row now. What is discomforting is the feeling of hot and cold effects at the same time. Anyway, I still feel feverish but not as bad as the last few days. Last night, I thought I will have a good night's sleep but it was not to be. For dinner, I ate a little fish, my first taste of meat for over 28 months and later the night, I began to have stomach discomfort and I was feeling a little hungry. Had an oatmeal but the stomach discomfort grew and churning all night. Finally early today, I vomited everything that I took since last night, much of it still undigested. I believe it could be due to the meat that I took last night. My stomach may not be used to processing meat and I learned of this effect from my vegetarian friends.

I am feeling much better now and taking some light meals. Tomorrow, I will be going to a clinic to check on my lumbar spine problem which has been affecting my right leg. I am now walking with a limp. Since I came back from China, my right leg problem has been improving by the day. Now when I cough, it's not affecting my nerves that much, hence it's not as painful as before. The knee joint area on my left leg is still painful and I hope to get a diagnosis as well. The pain from the former kidney tumor area is still painful but bearable. I think it's improving as well.

I could not boot up my PC since this morning and decided to give it a rest and try later the day. Only now I managed to get it to boot. I am not sure what's the problem. Most of the time it seems to hang after boot-up, so I have to restart at least twice each time. Maybe time to reformat and reinstall.

The Fever Continues

I thought that things would return to normalcy on Saturday but by nightfall, the fever returned. Yesterday, I was again down with fever. I went to the doctor and he said I caught a flu and gave me some medications, something for my cough, fever and flu. I could not sleep again last night as I was feeling hot and cold at the same time. My breathing was also heavy. It was really uncomfortable the whole night.

I feel a little better today but as the day progressed, I am feeling a bit cold again. Sigh... I have contacted my doctors in Chongqing, China telling them of my fever problem and see if they have some recommendation for me. There are still some pain around my tumor area. I have to be more patient as I think it would take a lot more time than I anticipated for the healing to take place.

A cancer friend sent me an email about a therapy called Fever therapy which is being practiced at 6 clinics in Germany. Apparently, former President Regan also undertook the therapy while he was the sitting President of USA. Yes, fevers kills cancer cells while normal cells can tolerate the additional heat. I am still reading more about the therapy and will write about it some other time. In Gerson Therapy, fever is actually a good sign, a sign of healing taking place.

Friday Night Fever

I think my fever has been broken. I feel much better today and I am not taking any chances of a relapse. So I am still wearing adequate protecting clothing to keep myself warm and so far so good. I have been feeling miserable since I came back from China because of the fever. It's so discomforting, not to mention the healing pain and also the pain from the leg. So this morning, to cheer myself up, I have been hearing some inspirational and soothing music (such as from Enya). The healing pain at the abdominal area and also pain from my right leg are also improving and I feel really relieved. I still feel weak and have been trying to eat more.

Yesterday night, I was feeling really frustrated as I could not sleep, partly due to the many naps that I took during the daytime and also because I could not breath normally because of the fever. I hope the difficult times are over and things would improve from now on.

Slow Recovery

I am still having fever. I have been feeling really uncomfortable because of the on and off fever that I have been getting and today, I feel even worse, hot and cold! So, I am taking some Acetaminophen (or paracetamol) round the clock today in an effort to shake off the fever by tomorrow. If not, I will see a doctor.

The HIFU treatment, even though is non invasive, is quite as bad as the actual surgery. For my case, due to the large kidney tumor, so my recovery period will be much longer. My doctors in China said of my recovery I am progressing well, although I my condition may change when I am back home. One of the important thing is to watch out of blood in urine or stools. I have been given Chinese medication to prevent bleeding and so far, there are no signs of it. Anyway, for the moment, the important things is to get myself to eat a little bit more nutritious foods and this may include steam fish for a short period of time. I have lost a lot of weight during my stay in China and it is important that I put back some weight first. I have anticipated this development and the risks involved before when I went for the treatment.

Next week, at the recommendation of a friend, I will be going for a test on my right leg to use some other non invasive methods of helping me to reduce the pain on my right leg. I will tell you more about it after the tests.

Less Mean More Pain

Yesterday, I was down with fever for the whole day. My head was a little heavy and I spent most of my time lying down resting. I was feeling a little cold and sweating the whole day. I thought things would improve today but that was not the case. The fever continued and like yesterday, I am resting. I am feeling a little better now, so I thought I would just make a short post today. Fever is good because it means that the immune system is working full swing.

Over the last two days, I noticed that there is a shift in pain on my right leg. Previously, when I cough, I would feel the full extent of the pain from the butt right to the toe. Now, as I cough, I don't feel so painful. Somehow, the cough is affecting the nerve on my right leg lesser now.  Somehow, I feel the pain on my right leg is not exclusively caused by the nerve pinching due to the bulging disc but a combination of the kidney tumor and the nerve pinching. Since now much of the kidney tumor is gone, it's contribution to the pain has reduced. The healing pain of the kidney tumor, however is still affecting me. Since I have reduce dependence on pain killers, I am experiencing more pain.

Healing Pains

Since I came back home, I have been sweating a lot. I also feel cold at times and not sure if I still have flu. So I used blankets at times to give myself the extra warmth. It's so weird. The temperature back home is so hot and yet I still feel cold. I wonder if my body has adjusted to the equatorial climate.

I have been resting a lot. The healing pain from the tumor area is quite consistent. It's not that painful but can be disturbng most times. I am trying to reduce dependence on pain killers. The pain from my right leg is more pronoumnced when compared to the healing pain. The only consolation is that the pain that I am experiencing now is not as painful when compared to in Chongqing. If I can reduce the pain from my leg pain, that would be wonderful and give me back my mobility. I am now looking at treatment options (other than back surgery) available to me. I have tried chiropractor and that did not help very much.

I have not responded to any of your comments, expecially when I was in Chongqing. This is because I have no access to blogger. So I like to take this opportunity to thank you for all of your comments, support and encouragement.

Where Am I?

Twenty nine (29) days just passed and now I am back home. That' how much time I have been away in Chongqing for my HIFU treatment. I will write about the HIFU treatment some other time as I feel there are somethings one should know about HIFU treatment (which you may not find people discussing it in the forums and also in the HIFU documentation).

One of the things that come to mind is how am I doing? Frankly, I am now very weak. I have lost weight and looked very thin and frail. This is expected because the HIFU treatment is a major procedure with the bulk of tumor tissues destroyed still inside the body. So the body is recovering and healing pains are expected. At this juncture, I have suspended the Gerson Therapy since I left for China on 10 December and the therapy will remain suspended (for about another half month or so) until the tumor pain heals. I have to be on a modified vegetarian diet to allow the body to heal from the treatment and also to gain back some weight. I have not been eating well or sleeping well while in Chongqing. However, I have been sleeping rather well since I came home.

The pain on my left leg has improved slightly, possibly assisted by the warm weather here. It's still very painful but when compared to when I was at Chongqing. I am not able to drive for the moment and will monitor the situation for another week before I decide the next course of action. Obviously, I will not have any treatment on my legs (or the bulging disc) until after the tumor pain heals. Meanwhile, I will proceed with the physiotherapy treatment as recommended by my orthopedic surgeon just before I left for China. At the moment, I am using pain killers to control the healing pain and as well as the legs pain. I have been coughing quite a bit since I came home and every cough causes severe nerve pain on my right leg (from the butt right to the toe).

Back Home Again

Yesterday, I spent most of the day traveling home. I left my hotel about 6.30am in Chongqing to catch the 8am train to Chengdu. I reached the train station about 6.50am and it was really cold outside. There were already crowds waiting to enter the train station to take their respective trains. The train ride was smooth and on time to Chengdu East Railway Station. From there, we took a cab straight to the Chengdu Airport.

The plane took off late and I think we were traveling almost for 25 minutes before we reached the runaway for take off. The Captain reported the delay was due to heavy plane traffic. The ride back to Kuala Lumpur seemed so slow. I think over 80% of the passengers on the plane were Chinese nationals either traveling to Malaysia for holidays or for work. My brother, sister and father met us at the airport at about 9pm to welcome us back. I have never been so glad to appreciate the warmth of the weather over the cold in Chongqing.

Last night, I had little difficulty sleeping thought there were pains all over my body, especially my right leg and also the pain from the kidney tumor healing.

Woke-up this morning at about 8.30am and had oats for breakfast. I was not feeling very comfortable and I think I may have caught the chill on the way back from China. I spent most of the today resting. I also took 1 pill of the Ultracet pain killer and was wondering if I should take the morphine sulfate tablet tonight to manage my body pain?

I would like to express my appreciation and thank my friend for taking so much trouble and time to update this blog on my behalf during my stay in Chongqing in China.

Home Sweet Home

I left the hospital after lunch yesterday and came back straight to the hotel and slept. I did not get to sleep at all the night before. My room mate woke up nearly every 1+ hour throughout the night! I was  really tired and so decided to catch up on some sleep first. I would say, I had not had good sleep since I stayed in the hospital because it was rather noisy at night .

Today, I took breakfast for the first time in the hotel after staying here for 26 days. I think the restaurant is not worth a second visit. What a shame for I feel that the hotel is quite good, a studio room, clean toilet and bed sheets. For me, it was a blessing in disguise as the plain porridge and food was exactly what I needed. My only complaint is the noise from the construction next door which goes on for 24 hours a day. This place is developing like Kuala Lumpur in the early 1990s, full of construction going on here and there, only on a much larger scale.

I am really glad that today is my second last day in Chongqing. It is cold and miserable here. I did not sleep well, did not eat well and was full of pain here and there during my stay here. I am looking forward to going home, away from this cold winter back to the warmth of the sun. I need the full sunshine to recharge.

I will leave Chongqing for Chengdu tomorrow morning  by train. Upon arrival, I will proceed straight to the airport to wait for my flight back to Kuala Lumpur. Back to my home sweet home!

The Results Are Out!

I went for my CT scan today. The results show that the implant was good and 90% of the kidney tumour was killed. However, the tumours too close to the intestines were not touched. The existing lung tumours grew a bit. I think it is a good result.
The doctors have also given me an injection for the blood in the urine. My urine is now normal.  To control the pain at my back area and my leg, I am given a new morphine patch every few days. It make me hallucinate particularly within the first 12 hours. Sometimes I feel like vomiting too. It is a strange feeling. But I would say that the healing pain as well as my leg pain is bearable.
Everything is on schedule. I will be discharged from the hospital late tomorrow.

Healing Pains

It is a cold and rainy day today. The temperature is 4 to 6 deg C in Chongqing. For the past two days, my urine has been a little red, which could mean that there is some bleeding inside. The pain from the former tumour area also gave me problems whilst  I was sleeping as well as during my waking hours. The doctors said it is a normal healing pain. As pain relief, they can inject some pain medication. I have spent most of my time in bed, resting

Happy New Year 2012!!

I wish my family, friends, ex-colleagues, acquaintances and everyone of you out there a very happy New Year 2012! I am doing well under the circumstances. Just a bit too much walking the day before so my legs are tired. I look forward to seeing some of you again when I am back in Malaysia.